Groundhog Day in June
What I have learned about men in my many years publishing Screw is that their brains are located in their penises. While I published Screw, I had men coming up to me all the time sharing their most intimate stories. I was like an obese version of Dr. Ruth. But unlike Dr. Ruth, the intimate stories I heard were all the same which made me feel more like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day. Whether the person was respectably married for fifty years with four children or a roving bon vivant, it didn’t matter. He always wanted and lusted for sex with two women at the same time. He wanted to vicariously stare at the mingling and massaged flesh as if he had made a trip to the zoo. For him, looking at lesbian sex was like going to the gorilla house at the zoo.
It proved what naves and fools men are because of their hormonally-controlled, testosterone-filled bodies. His focus on the excess was a compensation for the tedious and boredom of his own love life. It also showed a real lack of creativity and original thought.
Kings sacrifice thrones and fortunes for new pussy. Suicide bombers kill themselves with the promise of two dozen new pieces-of-ass. But all porn and pussy is the same. After 20 years of fucking around I no longer bother to remember the names of the all the girls I have had. They are just “the occupant” in my mind.
This is why pornography is so boring to me. It is all the same stuff over and over again much like politics. Even the coverage is the same. All these political wonks on CNN and Fox News believe that there is a politician that is different and really cares and isn’t just seeking power for powers sake. We know this to be complete horseshit.
Men are just fooling themselves into thinking that new woman whether real, online or on-screen will bring them happiness. We are also fooling ourselves if we think anything is going to change in January 2009 with a new president. It is unfortunate but I probably will not be elected, yet I am the only real candidate who will shake things up.
I will leave you with this thought: unless we get some serious funding, my run for the presidency is as fantasy-saturated as your dream to fuck two hot lesbians at the same time.
6 Comments:
When I was a teenager I was like that, always thinking with my dick, teens are like that but hopefully when we grow up we get wiser...
For your money problem it seem to me that you've been in need of funding for many years...!
What I meant to say is that for your money problem I noticed that, you've been in need of funding for many years!
If we fund you, will you choose Steve Gruberg as your Vice-President. I saw you and Steve on the Grube Tube Public Access TV show, you look good together.
As long as the American cow town electorate that counts is defined as southern white trash Waltons Forrest Gumpish, no candidate from the minority fringe of society has a chance regardless of money. But if you think that the utopian experiment that the US is will continue with business as usual after a hellish 8 years, then you are gravely mistaken. Already New England states are making plans to secede from the union. If things do not change in '08, then I predict we are in for a rude revolutionary reawakening...
Dear Teenager, every bad relationship I have had and every inadequate marriage was the product of me wanting to consume the woman in question into her every orifice with lust and confuse that with love. I am 71 and lonely because I never learned to love.
Anyone who wants to feed or fuck me please write to me at alvingoldstein@gmail.com.
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