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Friday, July 22, 2005

Number Eight: Pure As The Driven (Ivory) Snow


We live in a world of deception and self deceit, most of which is self inflicted. Ejaculation is our object but how do we get there? Relationships are too inefficient and costly. Dating takes too much time and expends to many hours in courtship and dollars spent on dining and chatter. Remember, we don't want a lifetime relationship. We just want to clear our cock of its backed up juices and shoot a load. What to do, what to do????? Obviously, its masturbation time! To hell with booking a date or begging your wife to spread her legs. And the $200 to $300 a prostitute requires is money better spent on electronics. You need the cavalry or it's Booble time! You must visit a porno web site where there are thousands of images of men and women fucking and sucking that will get you hard and ready for a launch of sperm that will relax you for the rest of the week. You can enter the mirror tunnel of erotica which is more like a visit to an old and recurring nightmare. Bereft of creativity, reality or the authenticity of a dick hardening recreation, do what I do which is bring back to mind my favorite porno moments of the past. For me it's that magnificent moment in 70's stag film history when "Insatiable" was released. Starring Marilyn Chambers as Sandra Chase, a sexually unfulfilled wealthy heiress working as a model who accepts an acting gig in a motion picture. But "off-camera" Sandra attempts to fulfill all her sexual desires with her thespian colleagues. That's what I love about this movie: It's so damn believable! It's the original reality porno!

One of tastiest pussies I ever licked in my 35 years as the publisher of screw (now bankrupt) was Marilyn Chambers. As it turns out, she had been a professional model and was on every box of Ivory Snow detergent. She was the doting mother on the box, not the cherub-like baby as so many seemed to believe. She was of perfect body and while still modeling for Ivory Snow she made her porno debut in the Mitchell Brothers film "Behind The Green Door." However, "Insatiable" is the Marilyn Chambers movies that contains the scene that still gets me hard to this day. It's of Marilyn stretched out on a pool table while that most famous man in all of porn history -- no, not Ron Jeremy -- John Holmes (a.k.a. Johnny Wadd) shovels his 14 inch cock down, down, down the throat of Chambers, even outsucking Linda Lovelace of "Deep Throat" fame. Sword swallowing had a new Olympic gold medal goddess and it was this schiksa (Yiddish for the golden goy who is the wasp cheerleader that hates your ethnicity and won't allow you to within a pubic hair's length of real sex with this fantasy-woman).

"Insatiable," a movie filmed in 35 mm with excellent technical attributes, sound, focus, lighting and, most importantly, a plausible plot with one of the most beautiful women in film and sucking one of the biggest cocks in stag film history. What makes this film so outstanding is that she sucks cock with gusto and, more importantly, passion. If this movie doesn't get you hard you either are a fag or dead. View this film to see what is wrong with today's vomit-filled sludge of one-hour porno wonders. Today all we have is quantity and no quality. Ease of viewing thanks to the Internet but nothing worth viewing. What a waste of technology! Its like all those gleaming and fast cars in LA sitting on throughways with no place to go. That's the story of pornography in 2005. A car crash and a cul de sac.


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