Random Musings on the Opposite Sex

-What do I miss most about having a new girl in my life? I want a pretty new girl to annoy me, irate me and say stupid things while not understanding my wittiest and most clever observations. I want the new woman to taste the same as all the other pieces of ass I’ve had but at least she’s there. Old cars are like old pussies, they rust and deteriorate. What I miss the most about my five ex-wives and hundreds of girlfriends is that I am always alone and have no one to blame for all the horrors that befall me. It has reached the point that I am thinking of going to a butcher shop and eating cow or pig pussy. But I still have my standards and refuse to suck pig cock.

-To date or not to date that is the question. It’s almost as important as Shakespeare’s to be or not to be which deals with death. My best friend is a movie director and he is kind and loyal to me but he has a dilemma. He was recently dumped by his girlfriend because he was not attentive to her and even though it is raining outside right now he is on the hunt for a replacement. I, on the other hand have a dead dick and would rather stay inside and watch nature shows and cable TV. I had a nice dinner, noshed on some ice cream and watched C-span and am preparing to go to sleep. I am not on the hunt like my friend. So, if anatomy is destiny then testosterone is doom. I am not a prisoner of my sexuality like men younger than myself although I write about being a prisoner. You are predetermined like B.F. Skinner argued in his determinism that we have no free choice. Younger man, you have no choice. You are merely a computer in search of what it is meant to search for.

-Isn’t it a shame that old girlfriends and wives do not become classics and just become old? There is a cliché that men want their women to be ladies in public and hookers behind closed doors. I want my woman to be the sharper image robot so that she can be turned off.

-Romeo and Juliet and the lies about love. All the songs we hear about unrequited love and the sadness when our hearts are broken are bullshit. If Romeo and Juliet really loved each other, they would have hope that they would find love again and wouldn’t have killed themselves. Love is a deception and a trap. Love is as a big a myth that God sits with his flowing white beard in a throne and looks at us.