Random Musings on the Opposite Sex
-What do I miss most about having a new girl in my life? I want a pretty new girl to annoy me, irate me and say stupid things while not understanding my wittiest and most clever observations. I want the new woman to taste the same as all the other pieces of ass I’ve had but at least she’s there. Old cars are like old pussies, they rust and deteriorate. What I miss the most about my five ex-wives and hundreds of girlfriends is that I am always alone and have no one to blame for all the horrors that befall me. It has reached the point that I am thinking of going to a butcher shop and eating cow or pig pussy. But I still have my standards and refuse to suck pig cock.
-To date or not to date that is the question. It’s almost as important as Shakespeare’s to be or not to be which deals with death. My best friend is a movie director and he is kind and loyal to me but he has a dilemma. He was recently dumped by his girlfriend because he was not attentive to her and even though it is raining outside right now he is on the hunt for a replacement. I, on the other hand have a dead dick and would rather stay inside and watch nature shows and cable TV. I had a nice dinner, noshed on some ice cream and watched C-span and am preparing to go to sleep. I am not on the hunt like my friend. So, if anatomy is destiny then testosterone is doom. I am not a prisoner of my sexuality like men younger than myself although I write about being a prisoner. You are predetermined like B.F. Skinner argued in his determinism that we have no free choice. Younger man, you have no choice. You are merely a computer in search of what it is meant to search for.
-Isn’t it a shame that old girlfriends and wives do not become classics and just become old? There is a cliché that men want their women to be ladies in public and hookers behind closed doors. I want my woman to be the sharper image robot so that she can be turned off.
-Romeo and Juliet and the lies about love. All the songs we hear about unrequited love and the sadness when our hearts are broken are bullshit. If Romeo and Juliet really loved each other, they would have hope that they would find love again and wouldn’t have killed themselves. Love is a deception and a trap. Love is as a big a myth that God sits with his flowing white beard in a throne and looks at us.
posted by Al Goldstein @ 2:33 PM
30 comments
30 Comments:
Yes, I agree love is a myth....and I theorize that commitment soley based on love will ultimately fail. The honeymoon ends, and crashes if kids come along. Men, in general can be happy just having a steady piece of ass. Without attention and romance the woman will eventually leave unless its not in her financial best interest to do so. Contrary to popular mythology, while men do crave to have sexual access to dozens, if not hundreds of women, that's not a reality for MOST men...unless they engage in the extremely expensive "escort" hobby. Anyway, with one divorce under my belt, I'm trying to find the right combination of elements that will keep me with a steady stream of sex. It's no easy task.
Hey Al,
Why don't you buy the cow or pig pussy, cook it up and eat it THAT WAY. And, if it tastes good enough, maybe you should pubish a cook book called "Cooking Animal Pussy".
Just a thought.
No, Al. Love is possible and it indeed exists. But only among those who are able to love. To experience it takes a selflessness and sharing that the vanity and narcissism of money, power and ego will not allow for.
The biggest big wig of old Hollywood, Louie B. Mayer, was quoted to have said on his death bed that "nothing matters". Why? Because despite all the greatness he had achieved in life...in the end he didn't have love.
Food for thought?
being in love is like going to church and believing in god. its superstition and you are doomed to spend your last days burning in hell if you belive in this.
you pal al
dear old school, i agree. i am an empty shell incapable of love, passion an intimacy. since i live in the moment tomorrow doenst exist. i dont disagree with you at all. thanks for you thoughts, al
Ah, screw them, Goldstein. In porn terms, SEX IS LOVE. You loved 7000 women once instead of 1 woman 7000 times. You are the MAN.
Everyday people and average Joes are slaves to routine. Others wish to live life to the horny fullest. Such variety is the spice of life.
Watch your old movies and relive the lust during the cunt drought. And a piece may cum your oral way sooner than you might think.
I mentioned you in my own blog today. Sort of.
Hey, can you explain a little about how a show gets on Channel 35? I used to watch that channel when I lived in manhattan. Is the entire channel owned by someone, or does TWC sell slots to people?
Ooroo, it was something fresh, thanks
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Al, I'm coming into Manhattan this spring/summer to see Ava, my new great niece. I want to take you for dinner; for all the times you stuffed my face with food. I'm at same address/phone or e mail me. Hope all's well with you. 5 Ex-Wives??? Holy Shit...Moose
Good writing!
I don't really have much to add...
Al, the picture you paint of yourself is a broke, complaining, cigar chomping diabetic who talks dirty all the time, doesn't go out, and watches CSpan and nature shows. How could such a creature attract a woman, even and old and ugly one? Just being as honest with you as you are with us. At least you have the memory of all that pussy to comfort you.
salami,
the greatest mistake i ever made is going for the quick ejaculation and the fleshy delight of the moment. the foundation of my ability to love has been eaten by termites. Going for the moment instead of the deeper pleasures of intimacy was a huge mistake. at age 71 i am lonely and without any of the sharing and happiness that couples can give each other.
AG
addendum:
for you fools who substutite a hooker for hand holding with a girl you like, you are pathetic and are making bad choices. i wish i could do it all over again and committ to one woman.
by the way, after eight year i have reconciled with my son. and maybe if i do not die within the next year i will have a second opportunity at completeness.
AG
hi moose,
i am lonely, sad and have made a total fiasco of my life. i would love to see you. email me at alvingoldstein@gmail.com and i will give you my number.
i do not regret publishing Screw, just the way I handled my personal life.
AG
Yes Al, a hooker experience isn't even close to what a real relationship with a woman is like. The delights of sharing activities with a woman (I'm not talking about sex) cannot be quenched by anything else. The problem is finding a woman who is happy to be there, as well as one who WILL stay with you.
ps I'm glad to hear about your son. That's terrific.
I don't know maybe it takes not having any money to find true happiness.
Whether tragic events touch your family personally or are brought into your home via newspapers and television, you can help children cope with the anxiety that violence, death, and disasters can cause.
Listening and talking to children about their concerns can reassure them that they will be safe. Start by encouraging them to discuss how they have been affected by what is happening around them. Even young children may have specific questions about tragedies. Children react to stress at their own developmental level.
The Caring for Every Child's Mental Health Campaign offers these pointers for parents and other caregivers:
* Encourage children to ask questions. Listen to what they say. Provide comfort and assurance that address their specific fears. It's okay to admit you can't answer all of their questions.
* Talk on their level. Communicate with your children in a way they can understand. Don't get too technical or complicated.
* Find out what frightens them. Encourage your children to talk about fears they may have. They may worry that someone will harm them at school or that someone will try to hurt you.
* Focus on the positive. Reinforce the fact that most people are kind and caring. Remind your child of the heroic actions taken by ordinary people to help victims of tragedy.
* Pay attention. Your children's play and drawings may give you a glimpse into their questions or concerns. Ask them to tell you what is going on in the game or the picture. It's an opportunity to clarify any misconceptions, answer questions, and give reassurance.
* Develop a plan. Establish a family emergency plan for the future, such as a meeting place where everyone should gather if something unexpected happens in your family or neighborhood. It can help you and your children feel safer.
If you are concerned about your child's reaction to stress or trauma, call your physician or a community mental health center.
Al, if you REALLY want to get more "pussy" then take it from me---ACT LIKE HUMPHREY BOGART! Thats right, watch "The Maltese Falcon", "Casablanca" or "The Big Sleep" and pick up some pointers there. Believe me, you would attract TOO MANY WOMEN!!
Al, you should consider doing a video podcast. You should talk to Booble to see if they can set you up with something like that. It can be like Al Goldstein's Online Fuck You Department! It would be like having Midnight Blue back, but only online. There are a lot of people that have video podcasts look at www.rocketboom.com as an example. They do there podcast daily. Just a thought.
Nice site! Keep it running!
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That is awesome news about your son, old guy! Perhaps all your suffering has a purpose, after all. Mazel tov!
dear hookerexperience,
i agreee totally. comparing the touch of a real woman is like comparing sex with a cockraoch. its fake, vacuous and fills none of our human needs. my lonlieness is based on my desperate needs to try one more time for a connection with a woman who wants me as much as i want her.
AG
dear glad to hear about your son,
i held onto the sickest relationship with a woman for a long time. the woman was younger and immature, selfish, sick and deformed. but i would even prefer that woman as a cripple to being alone. now that my son is back in my life i feel like i have a fighting chance.
AG
true happiness,
if that were true, go to the homeless shelter at bellvue and you would find ecstasy and joy. money means you can order from places other than the dollar menu at mcdonalds and not sleeping in the park.
AG
dear mazel tov,
the reconciliation with the greatest love of my life, my son, will keep me from suicide and possibly give me, if not a belief in God, a hope that life can improve.
AG
Al,
Keep doing what you have to do to keep yourself together. You have to be prepared for when that woman eventually does appear.
hookerexperience
Al,
I'm roughly halfway through your book and I'm enjoying it very much. Congrats about reconciling with your son.
You are in a unique business, but you obviously cared and still do care very much for your boy. I wish you all of the luck in the world, although you can obviously be a prick at many (or most of) the time.
Your heart is in the right place, and I respect you for that.
I remember seeing on the news (I'm a Native Floridian) about your fuck-you salute statue at your estate in Pompano Beach. I got a great kick out of it then as a teenager and it still gives me a great laugh. May you live a long live and prosper financially again!
C. P. Smith
I respect the naked truth of your words and the courage you've shown.
I also have experienced the loss of love and intimacy and question the purpose of a life lived alone.
The peculiar solace that creatures like us must grasp is the conviction of our own self worth that must not be dependant on the acceptance or approval of others.
The warmth and intimacy of a womans touch is something I long for and expect to return to one day which is something you will also again experience.
Love is a form of insanity and intimacy is something that fools embrace as a way of destroying themselves.
Sooner or later we may both achieve this goal.
Your style is unique compared to other people I've read stuff from. I appreciate you for doing this.
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