Revenge Never Works
I know it sounds ridiculous coming from a vengeful bastard like me, but revenge never works. It never works because there are casualties. It never works because everyone loses.
Right now we are at war with a country that was an enemy to our current president’s father. He is trying to compensate for his father’s premature pull-out from Iraq before toppling Saddam’s regime. But looking back, George the 41st was right in not taking out Saddam. Now we are killing civilians in Iraq. Some put the number at over 100,000. The entire Middle East hates us and lives in fear of being killed by our bombs. The war in Iraq was based on lies and revenge and everyone lost and continues to lose.
If I were to examine history, the only war that seems valid was against Hitler not only because he killed millions of innocent Jews, but also innocent gays and gypsies.
Let us not forget that George W. Bush is against stem cell research. His Supreme Court essentially reversed Brown vs. the Board of Education today. The conservatives on the court were hand picked by our president. They are anti-abortion and pro-guns.
The attacks on America are completely understandable. We are so quick to talk about the Nazis’ London but what about us dropping the bomb on Nagasaki. Whoever has the power makes the laws and those that are in power now are under fire.
That is why I am running for the presidency, not that I am more honest but compared to our current one I look like Mahatma Gandhi.
21 Comments:
i hope you win, mr. goldstein. a president i actually wanted to vote for would be so weird. i haven't voted for 25 or so years. i won't vote because i hate the other guy, that's crap. never voted for clinton, he killed a retarded man to prove he was tough. screw him, and her too, now that i think of it.
peter smith
Al,
I will sure as fuck vote for your fat jewish ass in a heartbeat.
Mitch Haase
Al, since you're only a hasbeen sleaze and not a rich crook, you aren't qualified to be Thief Exec. Who is your campaign manager, Penn or Teller?
With the big city 08 vote fixed by the GOP, white trash and redneck fans from the south, midwest and heartland won't go to the polls for a long dethroned smut king.
Thus judging from your rants and raves, you only deserve to be President of...
1. Porn
2. Old age
3. Obesity
4. Depression
5. Pussy Eating
We all have our limitations. Stick to yours. We need you here to kibitz and make us laugh.
This could be the theme for your presidency, all problems Foreign or Domestic can be solved with pussy eating contests.
That would be the legacy of the Goldstein presidency.
Ghandi liked the girls too. You can have a bunch of naked 18 year olds sleep with you in the White House.
Here is your first challenge, President Goldstein, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is being a menace to the world with his nuclear weapons building program. You invite him to the White House to discuss the issue and try to get him to stop building nukes, you suggest a way to end this problem is with a PUSSY EATING CONTEST.
The stakes are high for this one President Goldstein, if you lose Mahmoud gets to make his nukes and blow up New York and Washington, if you win Mahmoud stops making his nukes and America shows it appreciation to President Goldstein by giving you seventy-two 18-year old virgins for you to enjoy.
The contest has one glitch, Mahmoud insists on eating out his wife, covering her in a burqa, and HE will decide when she comes!
The Foreign Policy question for you President Goldstein is, how do you get around this obvious attempt by Mahmoud to cheat in this contest?
A pornographer is waaaay too honest to be president.
The worst part of your 'pussy eating' is that after the woman cums, she's left with you to deal with. At least with a vibrator she just unplugs it and enjoys the after-glow.
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Al,
you have got my vote....Honesty is the foundation for non-abusive authority and you have never had a problem speaking the truth; whether or not you felt it might offend others. And that counts for a lot. By the way, being recently diagnosed with multiple sclerosis , It offends me to know that Bush doesnt favor stem-cell research.
As an old fan of Mahatma G. I can only hope you will win. Go for it! Be fun! Be better (shouldn´t be too hard)! Save us from death by boredom or bombs from terrorists revenging Iraq. Here´s a few cheers from old "the west is the best" Germany, of all places. To try and corrupt you not to delete me out at once, because of that, please let me remark on my innocent birth in Sweden in 1962, I´m an old hag done by eastgerman refugees. And now let´s have a slight look at my dirty fingernails. Go for it, Al, you make me hope for all our future again! My best wishes.
Mahatma Goldstein? I like it!
Al,
I just got back from a week in Cabo San Jose, Mexico. Way better whore houses than Cabo San Lucas. The airport is right there too.
Check out Cabo San Jose when you're in the mood to fuck a cheap Mexican whore with a gold tooth.
Mitch Haase
Where's the Clown Prince of Porn?
Al,
There's a canker sore on the head of my dick even though I wore a rubber in Mexico.
Mitch Haase
Maybe al's on the campaign trail. Vote Goldstein for President!
gee...maybe Al has a girlfriend now and spends his day's eating pussy and taking walks on the Coney Island boardwalk with his sweetheart, instead of wasting his time writing blogs, reading pathetic comments and masturbating to internet porn. Maybe Al Goldstein has a life! You think so!
No. If Al had a life, his rants and raves would reflect the ego of old rather than the humility of poverty and old age. He wouldn't need handouts, he'd be living in LA
and have his own reality show.
The New York Times has promised me a headshot on my obit page.
AG
I try not to feel sorry for myself and I am thrilled that I do not have canver. I am also happy with the 35 years of great memories I have. My greatest flaw was not paying attention to the internet or those robbing me.
AG
Your too trusting, al.
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